Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Our Sunshine


I know that I originally said that I was thinking about starting another blog for this new pregnancy...this new little miracle, however, between not having the time to fully put my mind to creating something new as well as realizing more and more just how much Nicholas is a part of this new baby's life, I have decided that I will document some of our milestones here, on Nicholas' Touch. I hope not to upset or offend anyone.

This new journey, of growing life again after such a tragic loss, is a continuation of the path our life has taken us. What better place to share this new experience than the place I have received so much comfort and strength. Our baby boy, Nicholas and Nicholas' Touch have been such an inspiration to me. An inspiration to allow myself to grieve openly and honestly. An inspiration to reach out to others who are in the same world of pain we are in. An inspiration to love again... wholly and completely. Nicholas has been and will be with us every step of the way throughout this pregnancy. I can feel him... and when I close my eyes at night now, I often feel a sense of calm, peace. I like to believe that peacefulness comes from our very own Guardian Angel.

We had our 19-20 week scan today. We have opted to go downtown Toronto to the specialized hospital for our scans up until now.... more for peace of mind than anything else.

Everything looked very good. I have never seen a sweeter word than the word "normal" all the way down the scan report today. Phew. I do breathe a sigh of relief, however, this time in my pregnancy with Nicholas everything was fine too. It was exactly a week later that all hell broke loose. I don't think that I will fully breathe stress-free until we meet our baby girl in January.

Baby girl. I can't wrap my head around that either. I'm not sure I will know what to do with a girl! I am learning quickly that the doctors will not say with 100% certainty if they think the baby is a girl... no 'tell tale' sign, I guess. I just remember that with Kyle and Nicholas is sooooo obvious they were boys. The technician actually described the baby's sex parts as a "sandwich". Can't say I've ever heard that one before, but we got a kick out of it.

So... we'll see. I won't be painting the nursery pink just yet (although I am aching to).

Thank you for taking the time to read.

24 comments:

Tina said...

I am so glad you will continue to report about your sweet baby girl on this blog. Glad to hear all is well! xx

Emalee said...

I sure hope you get your little girl. wouldn't that just be great! I am glad you decided to share your sunshine here. Although we have all been through some kind of loss we all need a little ray of light too~

Mackenzie's Mommy said...

I'm so happy that you got good news and all looks well! Shopping for a girl is so much fun, too! I'm sure Nicholas is watching over his baby sister :)

xo
Ashley

alliecat said...

A girl! What wonderful news! And more importantly so glad your scans so far have been normal and healthy. Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers xxx

Mirne said...

I'm glad everything is going so well. And of course you won't relax until you hold this healthy baby in your arms. Just keep making plans for that pink nursery in your mind ... :-)

Emily said...

Thank you for posting about your little girl, Lea. I think it's important for us to see you come full circle, that there is hope after loss. We *need* to see that.

I'm so excited for you! We pray for you, your family, and your little guy (will be updated to little girl henceforth) all the time.

Congratulations!

Kate said...

Lea! I am so glad everything is going well and your little girl is safe and healthy. I am sure having a girl around will be a fun new adventure. :-) I remember when we found out Zoe was a girl...the tech used the term hamburger for girl, hot dog for a boy! haha!

Holly said...

So glad the scan was normal!! What a great thing to hear!! I don't mind you talking about your pregnancy here. I have wondered too whether I would talk about pregnancy on Carleigh's blog but decided I would b/c it is part of the journey.

Lindsay said...

I'm so glad that everything is normal. A GIRL! Oh my goodness a sweet little girl. I'm glad that Nicholas is sending you peace..
Love Lindsay

Nan and Mike said...

What a blessing :) I am glad all is going well, and I look forward to hearing more of your journey here :) Hugs, Nan xo

Mary said...

A little girl! Oh Lea that is so wonderful to hear. I know the boys are going to just love her and big brother Nicholas will be there for her always. I'll continue to pray that all continues to go well so that in January you hold a happy and healthy baby.

JenJen said...

Yeah! A baby girl! That will be something completely different for you :) She'll have two big brothers watching her down here and one big brother watching her from heaven~ what a lucky little girl!

And, girl clothes are so cute!

Fiona said...

That's wonderful news, Lea. I'm very excited for you. I also agree it's great to hear news of your journey with your pregnancy.

Tracey said...

Wonderful news! I'm so glad to hear the pregnancy is going well. And a girl! No doubt she'll be loved and cherished by all her big brothers. :)

Laura said...

So VERY happy for you!!!! Keeping you and baby (girl) in my prayers!!!
Hugs-
Laura

Bluebird said...

I'm glad you've decided to write here. I, personally, am of the belief that our blogs are about our lives. Nicholas is a part of your life, but so is this new little one. I'm honored to read about her :)

So glad the scan was "normal." Oh, and our u/s tech called it a "hamburger" :)

Monique said...

Oh, a girl! I'm excited...and so relieved everything is normal. xo

Bree said...

I've been wondering how the pregnancy was going. And, I'm so glad you decided to share some new with us. I had chills reading the last part of your post. A baby girl!!! Whooo Hooo! That is so amazing, Lea! I'm so happy for you!

Just Breathe said...

A baby girl is very exciting news. I will keep you and your baby in my prayers.

I think keeping the same blog is a good idea.

Inanna said...

A girl! A redheaded girl, I hope! :) So excited for you! :)

Demanda said...

My ultrasound tech referred to the "girl parts" as a cookie! I always thought that was hilarious. You will be a fabulous girl Momma! Keep up the good work and I'm glad Nicholas is going to share his blog with his baby sister :)

Amanda

Fireflyforever said...

Oh Lea,

I'm thrilled to read about your good scan and very tickled by the "sandwich" remark! Thank you for sharing your little girl with us here. Still remembering your beautiful, beautiful boy all the while.

Hope's Mama said...

Oh a girl!! Yay. Grow strong beautiful little lady.
xo

Lesley said...

Oh Lea! I am so excited for you!! A little sister for Nicholas!!! I will be praying for a safe, happy, healthy little girl in January for you!!!

I think it is a wonderful idea to keep sharing here, Nicholas is such a big part of everything you are going through. You have just helped me in my decision to start writing about our pregnancy on our current page- as soon as we tell our families!!!

I don't post often enough as it is, I have no idea how I would keep up with writing one more blog!

hugs to you!
lesley

Post a Comment