Nicholas' Touch: It comes every year

NICHOLAS WARREN REEVES

OUR SWEET ANGEL BABY

NOVEMBER 7, 2008

Dear Mommy and Daddy,

Before we said our first hello,

The time had already passed.

For when you held me in your arms,

I had gone to heaven to rest.

I felt angelic tears down my cheeks,

And I watched you as you wept.

I wish I could have changed it all,

Your tears touched my soul so deep

But mommy & daddy when you are sad,

Please be assured I know.

For death cannot take away your love,

It will only continue to grow.

When you are feeling far away,

And missing me so much.

Close your eyes and feel my wings,

Their soft and gentle touch.

Or at night as you sleep,

I will join you in a dream.

You will see me standing close to you.

And we’ll be lost within my wings.

So my dear mommy and daddy,

As you go from day to day,

Find comfort in the knowledge,

I am never that far away.

Angel Whispers

Thursday, December 20, 2012

It comes every year

Christmas comes every year.

For the past 3 years I have a lot of trouble with Christmas. With the holiday cheer, love in the air, little ones so happy and excited. I have had a lot of trouble exuding the Christmas spirit. I have gone through the motions and allowed my emotions get the best of me. I have hesitated with decorations and only put up the bare minimum for our children... the tree... the stockings... the "essentials". I have held back many tears and lived with a heavy heart...

This Christmas feels lighter. This Christmas feels more peaceful. I am enjoying the kids excitement and looking forward to their anxious little faces on Christmas morning as they wander down stairs to check out what Santa brought them. I feel an indescribable comfort that feels warm and familiar. I feel a wave of calm...

As I dusted Nicholas' urn today and gave him a kiss it stung a little bit more.... missing him at Christmas and always, but feeling him close and reminded of his touch on our lives.

3 comments:

Monique said...: Remembering Nicholas with you and wishing you peace.; December 21, 2012 at 2:42 PM
lost--for--words said...: I'm feeling a lot like this too this year. I still haven't done most of what I wanted to do this year for Christmas (decorating, tree up, etc,) but it's more because I just can't find time and space. The previous three years I've wanted nothing to do with celebrating anything. I'm kind of struggling with the whole family get together thing. It hurts that I know nobody will mention Freja :( Love to you and Nicholas!; December 22, 2012 at 2:53 PM
Hannah Rose said...: I know what you mean - Christmas is a hard time to live without our precious babies. I am so glad the ache isn't as much as it has been in years past. Merry Christmas! <3; December 23, 2012 at 10:05 PM