Friday, February 26, 2010

Thankful....

I have been thinking about my last post. While everything I wrote is very true and from the heart, there is so much of me that is thankful. Yes, we have been dealt a horrific blow that has forced us down a path of eternal grief, of missing our son. But we have also been blessed. I have been blessed.

I have been blessed with an amazing, loving and supportive family. Parents, brothers, sisters who have stepped up when I needed them most. I have been blessed with a strong, fantastic husband who makes us feel safe and loved. I have been blessed with beautiful friends (both old and new), with hearts of gold and souls of genuine kindness.

Most of all, I have been blessed with four extraordinary children. Each and every one of them teaches me something new each day. They have all taught me to love harder, to laugh louder, to hug tighter...

Evan is our 'smarty pants'. He is wise beyond his years and has such a good heart.

Kyle is our super sensitive boy. He loves hard and feels deeply. He is also the comedian in the family. Very funny boy.

Nicholas is our precious Angel Baby. He continues to teach me the meaning of unconditional love. He teaches me how to dig for my inner strength and he brings such a magical and pure element to our family.

Miss Madison is our beautiful girl. She has already taught me the true meaning of sweet joy and anticipation. She is our sunshine. Our light in what has been a very dark time.

Thank you all for your comments. I struggle. We all do. We all have our own pain. Our own kinds of heartbreak. But I also want to ensure that we try to focus on the positives too. Nicholas and his memory should not be surrounded by negative energy. He deserves so much more.

7 comments:

Bluebird said...

I love this. You made me realize that articulating what my loved ones - including our twins - have taught me is an exercise in which I should probably participate regularly :)

croleyc69 said...

Such a beautiful post !! {{HUGS}} from Nevada , Have a great weekend !!!
Caroline

Christy said...

It's so hard, Lea, to write about our grief without feeling like we are appearing ungrateful. I guess I can't speak for everyone, but even without you having to say it explicitly, I can tell how grateful you are for what you have and how blessed you feel. Having a loss as great as yours makes it impossible to lose track of how lucky you are in certain ways-but it can't discount how much you have lost either. What a delicate balance.
Gorgeous words, as usual.
Thinking of you!

With Out My Punkin said...

Beautiful post! ((hugs))

The Blue Sparrow said...

What a great post! I am so glad that you pointed this out. I dont want my angels memories to be surrounded by negativity either. *HUGS*

Mary said...

I am trying as well to bring up the mood in my blog. It is hard to see the light so early on in greif but as time goes by we will be able to show the other side. I am glad you are on the other side.

Jessica said...

Sometimes it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when you loose a child, but your optimism is inspiring. Thank you for this post.

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